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How to Turn Your Overwhelming Thoughts and Feelings into Your Greatest Allies

“A rigorously compassionate, Biblically-informed manual that can help you discover your true self in the choppy waters of life's ever-changing circumstances.” ―Sandra McCracken


“A phenomenal book — and one I’ve set aside to slowly read again and again until it’s part of who I am.”

Ann Voskamp, New York Times bestselling author of The Broken Way and One Thousand Gifts


''Personal growth requires that we create a healthy boundaries for our internal world, just as we are to do in our interpersonal relationships. Alison Cook and Kimberly Miller have written a very helpful, engaging and practical book on how to accomplish this process."

-John Townsend, New York Times bestselling author of Boundaries, and founder of the Townsend Institute


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“Is there a spirit-led self within you that emanates love and can lead your inner and outer life? Is it possible to love your inner enemies in the same way that Jesus extolled you to love your outer ones? In this beautifully-written book, Cook and Miller not only show you how to do that but also make a strong case that doing so creates enormous inner transformation and peace, turning former enemies into valuable allies. I am thrilled with the way they have translated my work for a Christian audience and believe this book is an extremely important contribution to our culture’s healing.” 

                —Richard C. Schwartz, Ph.D. Developer of the Internal Family Systems Model of Psychotherapy

“It was the Apostle Paul who first floated the idea that the very hardest parts of being "us"—or what he called "thorns in the flesh"—have the unexpected potential to become our allies. It is through our thorns, Paul wrote, that the power and grace of God are most vividly manifest in our lives. In this helpful volume, Kimberly and Alison have done a great job of showing us how God can repurpose potentially destructive "thorns" for good, including anger, fear, sadness, and guilt, so that we can become the best versions of ourselves. I hope this book is a help to you. It certainly was to me.” 

—Scott Sauls, Senior Pastor, Christ Presbyterian Church, Nashville, TN
Author, Jesus Outside the Lines, Befriend, and From Weakness to Strength

“Kimberly Miller and Alison Cook offer compelling yet accessible insights on a timely issue: our need to befriend the inner stranger/enemy. I hope many will read this book for help in establishing healthy inner boundaries and Spirit-led insights into our own divided selves. Our personal mental, spiritual, and emotional health depends on this kind of knowledge—and the health and common good of our society require that we examine our own inner landscape, searching for the clues that will enable us to resist coldness of heart. By gaining insight into our broken inner lives, we grow in empathy and love for those we naturally regard as strangers or enemies. Cook and Miller have given us a valuable tool to assist us in this important self-work.”

—Bruce Herman, M.F.A., Painter and author of Through Your Eyes

“In Boundaries for Your Soul, the authors have given us a great gift that will help people gain greater self awareness and new-found self-control over those unruly thoughts and feelings that threaten to derail our life and relationships.”

Leslie Vernick, relationship coach, speaker, and author of The Emotionally Destructive Relationship and The Emotionally Destructive Marriage

“Using a psychological lens to refract the complexities and conflicts of the soul, Miller and Cook offer a Christian perspective as a resource to provide awareness, insight, and guidance for anyone seeking to integrate their painful and conflicting thoughts and feelings and achieve internal harmony. This is a worthy challenge and theirs is a remarkable achievement. We highly recommend this book to anyone seeking inner peace and joy, and that is a lot of people!”

Harville Hendrix, PhD and Helen LaKelly Hunt, PhD, founders of Imago Relationship Therapy and New York Times bestselling authors of Getting the Love You Want and Making Marriage Simple



You can turn your shame to joy, your anger to advocacy, and your inner critic into your biggest champion.

Do your emotions control you or do you control your emotions? Many people let guilt, anger, or self-criticism dominate their lives and negatively affect their relationships. Boundaries for Your Soul shows you how to calm the chaos within. This groundbreaking approach will help you

  • know what to do when you feel overwhelmed,
  • understand your guilt, anxiety, sadness, and fear,
  • welcome God into the troubling parts of your soul, and
  • move from doubt and conflict to confidence and peace.

Boundaries for Your Soul includes relatable anecdotes, helpful exercises, an engaging quiz, and opportunities for personal reflection. Gathering the wisdom from the authors’ twenty-five years of combined advanced education, biblical studies, and clinical practice, this book will set you on a journey to become the loving, authentic, joyful person you were created to be.





Alison Cook is a counselor who specializes in the integration of faith and psychology. She holds an MA in counseling from Denver Seminary and a PhD in religion and psychology from the University of Denver. She and her family live in Boston, Massachusetts. Learn more at



Kimberly Miller is a licensed marriage and family therapist who earned a master’s degree in theology from Regent College in Vancouver, and an MA in clinical psychology from Azusa Pacific University. She and her family are from Texas and Southern California. Learn more at



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